Vatican Official Says No to "Code"

In a move sure to add to the box office numbers of the "Da Vinci Code" moview which is due to come out soon, a Vatican official has issued a statement urging people not to see the movie. This move further exemplifies how the Vatican pays almost no attention to the outside world as similar moves by "opposition" groups were wildly successful at keeping people from going to see "Passion of the Christ" and "9/11" as well as almost any other movie they really didn't want people to see.

Meanwhile Tom Hanks and Steven Speilberg have issued a letter of thanks to the Vatican for the additional free press and providing something for the press to focus on other than Tom, Katie, Brad and Angelina's kids.

Congratulations should also go to Steven Colbert on the birth of a bald eagle that has been named after him.

Allmans sue Sony

Shortly after the founder of Capricorn Records passed away, the Allman Brothers and Cheap Trick have found a new target. Sony Records has been withholding roalties from from most bands signed before 2002 (and the rush to digital music downloading). The bands are hoping to get the suit classified as a class-action to recover approximately 24 cents a song that Sony is writing off to "pressing" and "shipping" fees that Sony surely isn't paying for digital downloads from iTunes. The record companies have long taken advantage of most of their artists, its about time someone or something takes them down a notch given their general stance that they are losing so much money because of mp3's.

Rush

Continuing a tradition started in the movie "Rush," Rush Limbaugh was charged with perscription drug fraud today ending a nearly 2-year probe of the conservative radio commentator and his rather expensive habit of OxyCotin abuse. He plead guilty to only one of the counts against him, that of fraudulently obtaining perscription drugs through his housekeeper. The charges will be dropped if he continues drug therapy for the next 18 months. Certainly a case of a rich white guy receiving preferential treatment. Hopefully he'll remiss like some of his Florida neighbors, Dwight Gooden and Darryl Strawberry, or prosecuters will pursue some other charges. Lord knows with as much as Rush was using, it should take more than a little therapy to keep him clean.

View of O'Donnell

Rosie O'Donnell is expected to make an announcement today that she will be returning to daytime television as Meredith Viera's replacement. While there is little fear that Rosie will be able to hold her own on the show, having done so on her own show successfully, there are reports that Star Jones is quite upset.

"There's only room for one diva on this show, and that diva is me" Jones was overheard yelling. Producers are planning to have an eat-off contest between the fluxuating Jones and O'Donnell with the winner remaining silent for the rest of the show. Regular viewers are excitedly hoping Rosie wins.

Cities to be Closed

Taking a page from the French, millions of Latinos are planning to take to the streets of major American cities (assuming there are Latinos in or near them) to protest in support of amnesty for illegal immigrants.

The protests are expected to be the largest since the civil rights era of the 1960's with 2 million expected to be in Los Angeles alone.

Critics of the protests are charging intimidation and perhaps misdirection. For if the protestors are going to shut down these cities, which are generally amongst the more liberal and pro-immigration, aren't they in effect just pissing off their supporters? 

A number of businesses have already planned to close to allow their workers to attend the ralies.

Denise Sambora?

Assuming Richie Sambora didn't take Heather Locklear's last name, the former Mr Locklear was recently seen playing tonsil hockey with the recently mentioned Denise Richards or Charlie Sheen fame. While obviously a testament to her great choice in men (or money anyway) it seems there are some questions as to how "off" Sambora and Locklear are. Then again, it didn't bother Richards too much when Sheen wasn't very off with his ex's (professional or not).

Two and a half Men

Thank god for the making public of court documents. Copies of Denise Richards' divorce petition against Charlie Sheen are making the rounds on the web courtesy of thesmokinggun.com. Apparently the well known playboy wasn't to secretive in keeping his porn surfing private. Supposedly he was into some young teen boy on boy and girl on girl videos. And what is sure to rock the google search engine, he reportedly has pictures of his erect penis on his profile on a few adult friend finders.
Also of news is that Sheen was quite the sports bettor, but unlike Janet Gretzky, he seems to have won a few times as well as losing hundreds of thousands of dollars.

Roth Out!

David Lee Roth is reportedly out on the CBS station morning shows he took over from Howard Stern. According to siriusfannetwork he will be replaced in his markets by the "Opie and Anthony" show which was previously booted from Viacom's radio waves after airing a show where two people were having sex in St. Patrick's Cathedral.

The show will be a simulcast of their XM Radio show, presumably with a delay and someone sitting on the kill switch. While a good move of O&E, and perhaps questionable by Viacom and XM (the latter based on the terms of the deal) its not clear why or if Viacom ever approached Sirius with a similar offer for the Stern show itself, which would have seemed like an obvious fit upon Stern's departure to Sirius Sattelite in the first place. While Howard this morning is claiming his love of his current deal, one has to imagine he's kicking himself a little for not finding yet another revenue stream to line his pockets with. Additionally Sirius could have had another revenue stream. Personally I thought Viacom was going to do this with Howard when Stern left. Maybe the deal falling through is why the lawsuit for stealing advertising time was brought.

Not sure if this helps XM draw new subscribers as their once "premium package" performers are now going to be available for free in a number of the country's biggest radio markets. Or will this drive more people to Sirius for variety since the unique content on XM is now available for free again.

GE Prepares Suit Against Couric

Rumors are circulating in the news media that GE, parent of NBC television, is preparing to sue Katie Couric for part of her $15 million pay package for improperly promoting her move to CBS.

The move is thought to be a daring challenge to CBS and Leslie Moonves who recently filed suit against former radio and now Sirius Satelite Radio personality Howard Stern. Said a spokesman for GE, "While we understand Ms. Couric is leaving the Today show, and that the move is 'news' we have not given her or any of our others shows explicit permission to talk of the move, thus we are suing CBS for what is in effect the millions of dollars of free advertising they are getting."

Seniors in CA find new ways to hold up traffic

Take away their drivers licences and these crafty San Fernando Valley seniors have found a new way to annoy you without leaving their turn signals on indefinately and hovering in the left lane.

An 82-year-old woman was recently given a ticket for crossing the street too slowly in what now is getting top attention (in the LA area, at least until Paris Hilton comes outside again).

France OK With Change

French PM Dominique de Villepin is on the defensive. He was caught on Europe 1 radio claiming "the French accept change but always want to be assured that it is fair."

Unclear is if this includes the German occupation. As so far, the only change that the French seem to accept is protest and strike subjects. A fluid economy with loose labor laws is just what budding businesses want, and the French don't have.

CPE is dead

France's "First Job Contract" (CPE) has been killed. Villepin has said he regrets the strikes by the thousands of "lazy French students."

Students had planned to March Tuesday and it was unclear if they would call off the strikes and blockades after the announcement. "We've tasted this non working thing, and truth be told, we like it. To truly embrace the French culture, none of us should work," said a striking student.

The French government was unsure if the strike would break, but felt confident it would, "To strike would mean they have to stop sipping wine and eating cheeses, no way they're going to do that, besides a transit strike is scheduled for Thursday in an effort to get more paid striking days. Two strikes in a week is too much work for these people."

He said someone else said this other guys told him....

Papers filed by prosecutors in the CIA Iraq intelligence leak claim the President Bush authorized the aide, Lewis 'Scooter' Libby to disclose intelligence information about Iraq.

Unclear is how moronic this story will actually get. The inspiration for the line of defense suppsedly came from the child of Libby's lawyer after being questioned on who told her she could stay out late one night.

"It confused me, and honestly, I was blaming my wife for a while, thinking she'd given permission without asking me," said the lawyer. Asked if the plan worked, his daughter replied in a hushed voice,
"My parents aren't too smart."

In other news, trying to be used for policitcal gain, Republicans are quick to denounce Georgia Representative Cynthia McKinney's attacking of Capitol guards after asking her to pass through a metal detector because she didn't have her House ID on her. Republicans claim she's representative of the Democratic party, McKinney originally claimed racism, fellow Democrats are trying to deny any association with her.

Cruise Hates Bullies

Tom Cruise hates bullies, he tells in the upcoming Parade magazine. His dad was a bully, "a bully and a coward."  His dad who died of cancer in 84 is of course not around to defend himself. But if his dad was anything close to the size of Cruise or David Spade, picking on little Tom may have been only chance Big Tom had of finding anyone smaller than him.

Cruise reportedly had a tough time in schools, going through 15 in 12 years, preumably the cause of this was not his beating up the school "bullies."

Saddam Back in Court

Going on the "who me?" offensive, former Iraqi leader Saddam Hussein is accusing the Interior Ministry of killing and tortuing thousands of Iraqis. When questioned if he ever instituted such types of acts, Saddam respondedn "What's on trial here? What happened years ago or what is happening today?"

When told that he in fact was on trial, Saddam responded, "This never would have happened under my rule."

French Students Strike Again

Tired of striking at low wages against firing policies for young workers, French students have chosen to strike again this week against their current strike.

Once again, garbage is overflowing, there is limited train service and the Eiffel tower is closed on what the French are beginning to call "Tuesday".

Tom and Katie Wedding on Hold

The kid will be born out of wedlock as Tom Cruise has announced that his and Katie Holmes' wedding won't happen until after the birth of "their" child.

To has two pilots on standby to fly him back to Katie so he can be back for the birth of the child and see Katie's "icky parts" according to a Cruise spokesperson.

Unknown is the status of Scientology for the poor kid and Katie. Also likely sue out this summer is the release of "Runaway Bride 2 - The Story of Katie Holmes" which her fans are eagerly awaiting.