Cheney Whittington to Duel

In a surprise announcement Vice President Dick Cheney has agreed to a duel with his injured hunting mate, Harry Whittington.

Cheney visited Whittington in the hospital where Whittington slapped Cheney with a white glove, thereby challenging him to a duel.

"Thank god he avoided Nam," claimed a still hospitalized Whittington. "He couldn't hit lobbyist payouts at an Abramoff golf outing. Imagine the friendly fire hits that could have been."